Putting The Parent Back In Parentheticals

Yeesh, it's hard to recover from a pathetic blog post like that last one. But today I will try to look on the bright side of life ("Alllllways look on the briiiiiiight siiiide o' life" lalalala) and write about something that always makes me feel better: my kids.

Today is a special shout-out to Eli, because today is his birthday. He's 5 years old. 5! Years! Old! Somehow 5 seems like such a milestone to me. He'll be going to Kindergarten, learning to read, learning to ride a bike, maybe even losing his first tooth. Eli at 5 is so different than Eli at 4, yet his basic personality hasn't really changed. He's still a sweet, generally good-hearted, thoughtful, friendly, goofy, talkative kid. But now we have long conversations about bugs and God and the things he does with his friends at school, and I'm amazed at the increased complexity of his understanding of the world, and of other people. He's such a boy now, all about the superheroes and guns and bugs and dinosaurs and racecars, into physical play (run! jump! wrestle! chase!) with his friends and talking about blowing up bad guys with sticks of dynamite (uh, that one comes from TV, I'm pretty sure) but still young and innocent enough to want to sleep with his teddy bears every night and snuggle with his mama.

I am thrilled with his new maturity and sophistication and eagerly anticipating watching him take on new challenges, new skills, and new interests as he moves through his 5th year. But like every mom, I think, I'm also going to miss some of the younger, less complicated times, where really his needs were simpler and relatively easily fulfilled by an attentive parent willing to be his playmate or emotional touchstone. There will be a time very soon (if it isn't here already) where I really can't be all (or even most) things to him, and he’ll push away in search of what he needs. But as I like to remind him every chance I get, even when he's a grown up man, with kids of his own (God willing), he'll always be my baby. I'll always look at him and see all the ages he's been and love them all simultaneously, while still enjoying watching him move on down the path of his life (and cheering him on).

Happy Birthday, Eli…you're a superstar, and you're going to have a great year ahead of you. Your mama loves you.